The News isn’t Good

I’m sorry I’ve been absent friends.   It’s been a stressful 2 weeks.  It started out with sciatica problems the day of retrieval.  I was in pain for 7 days.  It’s still sore but no longer shooting pain.  Then I thought my PIO shots were going well but on day 10….welts all over my backside.  They’ve been there for 5 days now, are huge, and itch…a lot.

I’ve been spotting off and on for 3 days now and have been feeling really down.  Today is 12 days post 3 day transfer and I got a BFFN on a home pregnancy test.   So I don’t have much hope that my beta will be positive on Tuesday.  To say I’m crushed would be an understatement.  I tested Wednesday as well with the same results.   I’ve been crying a lot for 3 days.

I don’t know if I can go through this again.  I don’t have many eggs left and the chances of pregnancy are not good.   I’m sad, I’m angry, and I want to know why me?   Why can I not have a child?   Why can some people get pregnant at the drop of a hat but we got through all these procedures and still aren’t?  It isn’t fair and it’s shaking me in ways I don’t like.

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16 thoughts on “The News isn’t Good

  1. lgandlg

    I’m so sorry to hear this. I’m about 2 weeks post miscarriage and let me tell you, while the anger /sadness/resentment didn’t quite go away, you do eventually move on. I’m sure you’ll have a discussion with your RE and try to come up with a new plan. All I know is I’m not ready to give up yet and I hope you aren’t either! I hope you keep the faith going forward. It’ll take time but that’s the only way!

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    1. 26rainbow Post author

      Thank you. I’m so sorry to hear about your miscarriage. I had one after my first IVF cycle and it was very hard to get over the bitterness and sadness. Sending you lots of good thoughts and hugs as you continue on your journey.

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
  2. branny

    Thinking of you. This is not fair. That’s the only way to put it. There is nothing I can say to help you feel better but just know I’m thinking of you.

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    Reply
    1. 26rainbow Post author

      Thanks, it means a lot to me. I’m just in a bad place right now but I know I’ll get through it and it helps that friends are thinking of me.

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